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Geo
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« Reply #15 on: August 20, 2015, 09:38:40 pm » |
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An 8 year old short...
The Fateful Wish
By William Pratt
“And for my final wish, I wish for nerds to get respect!”
“Wish granted,” said the Genie. “A pleasure doing business with you.”
The Genie vanished back into the lamp, and Calvin looked down the front of his pants, smiling at what he saw. He couldn’t wait to get to the bathroom and try it out.
Unfortunately, his sister hogged the bathroom, putting on her make-up. Only this time her nails looked strategically chewed and she wore huge, coke bottle-lensed glasses. On the counter sat a contact case and with his now-perfect vision, Cal could read that they were specially made to distort her eyesight enough to need her glasses. As Cal watched, she applied a pair of fake buck teeth.
“Do you mind?” she lisped, glaring at him. “I have a hot date tonight.”
“Oh, not that asshole jock, Nathan, again!”
“Eeew. No! Rupert is taking me to the new Dustin Diamond computer hacker movie. He’s so hot!”
“Who, Rupert?”
“Duh! Dustin! Rupert’s not bad, though.”
“Lovely,” he muttered, headed down to the kitchen for some Frosted Sugar Bombs. “She’s still a fashion whore.”
The Fox fanfare (with the Cinemascope extension) erupted in his pocket. Pulling out his cell phone he answered with, “Yo. Whazzaaaaap?”
“Calvin!” shouted Sam. “We’re all bussing down to Lynwood! Be at the mall in twenty!”
“Uhm… What for?”
“My god! Haven’t you heard? Weird Al was gunned down half an hour ago in a shoot-out with a bunch of east coast COBOL-coding motherfuckers!”
Silence reigned as Cal fell to his knees.
“NOOOOOOOOO!”
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